in all fits of anger and desperation, one cries to the hospital for help and another pleads to the savior for solace.
Fuck off.
i’m 19+ and living the life of and old guy, the body of a soon to be 30, and the mentality of a 10 yr old.
at least, that’s what i think it is.
im shocked by many many things; some things just are not meant to be there to shock me.
today was one.
heard a compliment like a raw diamond, yet feel that the peak of mentality has been reached.
loving someone so much, but getting both annoyed and gratified at times when getting back at this one. occasionally regretting it *twang*
attempting to save money for better things and spending it on cooler things.
aiming to exercise while binging with irregular meal cycles (sounds like a recent satirical comic strip on the Straits Times)
seeing these double standards and just justifying them, saying this is different, that happens for a reason.
ergh.
hopefully i can feel better…not.
i’ll need to go quarrel with my walking reflection for help.
the title says it all. i don’t know why or i’d nv write it..
Tomorrow I’ll be done with the Haka and the Cheer.
Right now doing the finishing touches on the stupid cheer.
I’ll remember to promise within my means…well a cheer is, but i’m not up to it. my cheers sound corny.
as i looked thru my password protected entries…realised i can’t rmb the pwds anymore! lol, guess that means i don’t need to revisit my bad memories (and good ones too, damn.)
and i also need to get into the last vowel. and a FTT date. and need, want, to glare, disturb again!
sat by my bed not long ago and thot abt my direction in life.
about to go back to last yr mode. again. better not.
well, it’s a new year, so I decided may as well shed those banana skin themes.
2009. I have NO idea what awaits my friends and I in this year. Hmm…wondering if we’re flexible, able to change our activitiy list as we meet new situations (somehow the economic crunch hasn’t really sunk in yet in my skin. i do hope i can feel it soon, i need the $)
while 2008 ended like most years, swirling with both positive and negative feelings (had to work in the night shift, sigh ok that’s a lie, i felt like shit becuz i got called back to work. SIA. but i lived with it and yet enjoyed it with my fellow colleagues), i felt that this year is different because i no longer look forward to another school year. Strange, and to think most of us had the thought of leaving school and saying, “finally out of school-conscripting.” only to wonder if we really are victims of the phrase, ‘the grass is always greener on the other side’. things weren’t so bad in school. at least we enjoyed together, suffered as well. we may not always stood by each other, but at least we darn hell lived with it together.
and it made a difference. i do miss school now, honestly. what’s left of school. most of the teachers i find familiar are gone. and that reminds me, i’m hoping yuanhao, andre, eugene, ian, edwin, shawn, amos, shao wei, op, ge, and anyone else whom im unable to remember at this slpy hour [cuz i just dotated, left the game becuz he left w/o a sound or smt ):< oh well ] do well for their exams.
just wondering…having met with some conflicts, why m i able to control myself better in a dota game than a real life thing? wish it were the other way round sometimes.
my eyes are burning. ok, night.
wordpress has changed again? now the format’s different.
anyway, merry christmas to all. err…u were born at that time. of course ur pisces =D
yesss…my memory of the little details here and there has been helpful time and time again. i’m doing ok now!!
i’m still waiting to be trained =(
i suddenly felt the urge to write here.
might as well make use of it, before the creative thoughts run out….not that i had much creative thoughts anyway. found this book on how to develop your creative intelligence, just to see if making excuses for whatever you do means ur positively intelligent! see, i just proved im so creative! im deceiving myself. lol, but that book is real convincing. maybe i’ll follow its ideals?
ahh..another example, just now i had a very interesting conversation where usually byron and i think quite on the same level, today we just seemed to filter off each others’ conversation. lol. BYRON I KNOW YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN SO DON’T DENY EH.
thank you to the many ppl who wished me happy birthday, i’ll remember it for long as my sotong-blur brain can let me =) (someone really made me scared lor. luckily the day ended well in the nick of time, and not too soon! =D)
while i cant give gd organised entries, at least i do know what i’m ranting about at i look at my words. 
Well.
Since I’ve been smacked with a trout so subtly by him, I guess I’d better not let him get another chance to anymore.
Yes, I’ve been busy with too many things outside that I’ve never had a chance to blog. Going out with them…eating out with them…lanning with them. Haha, almost everything with them would really sum things up.
The only thing that I do worry about is that I miss out on catching up with my other cliques of friends, who do matter to me at some point in time of my life. Adrian, Aaron, Ong, Xinwei, Joshua, Yuan Hao, Andre, Ian, Ling, etc…Is this a big revelation on who really matters to me? Or am I just being insensitive and afraid that I’ll lose them if I focus on too many cliques?
Curb, control, but don’t crack. I’ll do my best.
P.S. I Love You sounds like a nice movie to watch. But…no time. Leap year neither. So…another time.
PS. Screw, now I know how weak my arms are.
